Gun Painting

NAILED!

Got shot in the neck yesterday by one of my truest mates Gabe Barnett, whose forthcoming nuptials we were celebrating. I was trying to take out his brother, who was peppering my position from behind one of those big old wooden spools. Suddenly, in my periphery Gabe frames the entryway to my bunker--GATGATGAT--two to the torso, and one to the adam's apple--down i went. You're supposed to yell "I'm Hit" when you're out, but all i could do was flop a couple times. I held up my gun, rose slowly, hobbled out arms raised, and squeaked out a raspy "Nice shot dude."

Gabe Barnett! We met six years ago at an open mic and bonded cause we both played anti-war songs, how ironic is that! He's the only dude I know who has more pacifist songs than me, that he still sings anyway--lately i've just been singing songs about sunshine and love.

I got in a coupla pretty slick kills myself over the seven hours we were there. The eight of us had the whole place to ourselves all day, most likely due to the absence of any shade and the 97 degree heat index. It sounds miserable, but I don't think I've had that much fun ever, or at least not that kind of fun. My neck welt's starting to subside and I'm kinda sad cause it's fun to tell people the story about it. Sadism? Yikes, maybe. I suppose it's only natural to want people to think you're tuff stuff. Hmm... natural...

Gabe's brother Alex, who set up the outing, is an Iraq vet. You'd think the two would be polar opposites and constantly arguing, but after a full day and afterparty of hanging out with them i never once saw any friction, even when Iraq and Afghanistan entered the conversation. One of the other dudes who was there is in the army; he's shipping out to Afghanistan in March. What makes it possible for hippies and soldiers to have such a fun time together? Must be the joy of our mutal friend finding himself a solid woman.

From a very young age I've always felt war and killing to be an absolute wrong. Yet after hanging out with dudes who've seen it or are gonna see it for real, you just feel like--what do I know? I mean, my dad's a Vietnam vet; grandpa, WWII Navy; uncle, career Navy; cousin, Army Ranger, and the thing I've realized is that I've never talked to any of them about war--I mean, what do say? -"Um, hey you wanna talk about war?" --It just don't come up. I've written several blatantly anti-war songs, and twice as many "pro-peace" songs--why is it so easy to sing about it, and not talk about it?

In the end i think what makes it easiest for many troops to tolerate us hippies is the fact that they understand we're raging against war itself--it's existence at the expense of more practical tactics like being nice to people who hate you, perhaps even giving to them the resources in bread and shelter what we instead spend killing them.

Yet the troops don't control those resources. We do, the people of this country, and so they fight on.

Is it pretentious to think this way, when pretend war feels so...natural? Will war always be a part of the human experience? Should we even pretend that it can be stamped out of human history? Should we all just live our lives with the knowledge that when war comes into our lives we should fight in honest valor, prayers prayed to our gods...

Nah, I'm sticking to my guns about non-violence and all the never killing absolutes i can be such a prig about, if only because it's a truth i feel in my heart and soul. But feeling the rush and excitement of battle... it puts it into a clearer perspective of why some choose to sign up...

Someday I know we will realize the ten-fold power of charity and compassion over bombs and bullets. Hey, if the human race ends up missing war that much, we can always play paintball. I think that would satisfy Nature, and our own natures just fine.